The first unit of the literature component of my Grade 9 English class was Greek mythology. The myths chronicled in our textbook were brief and to the point, with high drama, complex relationships, and yet a familiarly human element. What was presented as a series of random stories coalesced into a universe with rules and […]
When I hang out in my communities of “alternative sexuality” (read: folks that tend to identify as kinky, queer and/or non-monogamous), I see a sea of White. Not white as in contrast to the black of the leather, or the rainbow of gayness. No, I see lots and lots of Caucasian folks. And folks, this […]
I’ve noticed over my years in this fun-filled kinky world of ours, is that some of us grew into our kinks, while others have known since childhood. I fall into the latter category: had my first subspace experience in nursery school, in fact. It wasn’t a sexual encounter – I was the ‘patient’ in a […]
Modern mythology can be an amazing tool to bring the sacred into our lives, to change the way we think about the world for the better… but it is also used, often unconsciously, to preserve prejudice, support misinformation and perpetuate violence Virginity What were you taught about your virginity? How did this play out in […]
Earlier this week when I was at my local meditation center conversing with my meditation mentor about keeping up with at-home practice. For those who don’t know… ideally someone meditates in a specific room in their living habitat which is off-limits to sexual activities. My meditation mentor had suggested that I find a space to do […]
In William Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice, Shylock muses “If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?” after being mocked and derided for his outsider status as a Jew. Many in the BDSM community are left asking the same […]
There comes a point in nearly everyone’s life as a polyamorous person where they ask themselves the single most important question they can. Unfortunately, it usually comes under a cloud of doubt, pain and misery. It is almost always a “newbie” question, but it can happen to anyone. The way it usually happens is all […]
In these days of fetish social networks and online dating sites, it can be easy to browse an individual’s page and learn pretty much any detail you want to obtain. But in the days before easy to access “hook-up” sites, the information had to be subtle enough to hide from the squares but still be […]
What is it with names? In the world of BDSM we have the opportunity to choose our own names, something rare in the rest of our lives. The names we choose speak volumes. Yes there are photos, art, and other creative ways to describe ourselves, but our names come first. We choose scene names to […]
Being kinky can be frustrating, even maddening at times. I remember, as a kid stumbling into my first fantasies, and feeling isolated and freakish, when I realized that some of the things I wanted were pretty exotic compared to most people. I was in my early 20’s before I actively pursued kink with others openly. […]