Kate Bornstein wrote about the modern imperative for identity in her landmark book, “Gender Outlaw”. Identity is the “need to belong” to a recognizable group, and in her opinion, this is particularly true in regard to gender and sexuality. “Monogamous” is one of the largest self-identified sexual identities, and according to at least one study, […]
Both my boyfriends are runners. One, in fact, runs marathons. Although built differently, they are muscular and lean. When we get naked I spend a lot of time running my hands over their chests and abs and legs, luxuriating in the different textures of skin, hair, muscle and bone. They’re beautifully constructed, and I love […]
To fully understand how we connect within relationships, we have to realize that we are energy beings that reside within a human vehicle. When we go through life holding on to pain we have experienced in past relationships, we begin to create a build up of resentment that blocks our natural flow of energy. Some […]
When last I visited my Seattle boyfriend, we were holding hands in public on our way to a movie in the downtown area. After many years of therapy and self-work to rid myself of abusive religion in my childhood, I was proud of myself for being so comfortable — almost unconscious about expressing basic affection […]
“I know for a FACT that, if I actually wanted to or TRIED, I could fuck ANY ONE of my ex-girlfriends!” My other male co-workers nodded in unison at The Cartoonist’s affirmative statement. “Bullshit,” I replied. I demanded that there was no way in hell any guy I’d already been with could just magically get […]
Polyamory and poly relationships are complex. Which is no surprise if you know anything about or have any experience with polyamory. But for people new to poly, managing poly relationships is an exercise in higher math that they might not be aware of. Let’s take a simple example, and one common to the kink world. […]
By Micah Schneider In the last month, I’ve seen this question come up in more than one place. Is polyamory something that you do, or is it something that you are? Are some people poly the same way some people are homosexual or straight, submissive or dominant or a greedy bisexual switch? My answer is […]
By Sarah Sloane Dear Sarah, I am a novice dominant and I’m interested in finding a submissive; I’ve been trying to get to know people at my local munch group (as well as online) but I’m having trouble with finding someone special. Some people treat me like I don’t know anything because I’m young (I’m […]
By Jay Morgan One of the many reasons I like to play golf is that it is entirely up to me, and only me, to play well. No matter whether you are a professional, amateur, or weekend hacker, every golf course gives each player the same chances to score well. Similar to bowling, billards, or […]
By Graydancer “It’s hard to wait for something you know might never happen, but it’s hard to give up when it’s everything you want.” – SexCigarsBooze, via Twitter Change is hard. It reflects an uncertainty to life that we don’t like. We like to feel like we know what’s going to happen, even when the […]